How Does It Feel?
by SpiffyLucylu
Summary: How do the residents of Trenton answer the question: How does it feel to lose the best thing that's ever happened to you? A little bit angst-y, but always a babe!


**Melanie Campbell posted another challenge on Facebook (in BOLD). Margaret got the ball rolling, and hopefully I hit all the pins! (decided on a bowling metaphor instead of baseball.) Funny how sometimes the people you least expect are the ones that care the most... BTW, Helen is drinking a coffee recipe called Paradise Found. Next time I get me some schnapps, I am totally trying this!**

 **Everything belongs to JE (still), I'm just glad she shares. Let us know what you think, we love hearing from you!**

Everybody says that Stephanie Plum snuck out of town under a cloak of secrecy. Days had turned into weeks, turning into months...then suddenly half a year had gone by and there was still no word from the Bombshell Bounty Hunter. Used car dealers listened to the police band forlornly, waiting to hear about a car explosion. Waste management personnel checked dumpsters for strange women. Two ladies waited in the bonds office for a box of donuts that never came.

Silently, all this time changes were coming to those that tried to change her, make her comply with what they wanted, and deemed necessary to make a good life for herself. Everyone finally woke up to the harsh reality that what they thought was going on was just a lie they told themselves. You see, Stephanie had grown up and made some changes in her life, all in such a way that _no one that thought they mattered to her, really did._

Gossip about Stephanie stopped completely on the morning Helen Plum woke up to find her husband's wedding band resting atop a note that simply said, " **I'm Done** ". Helen stopped 'tippling' and graduated to full out drinking. Her 'friends' called her with condolences and kind words, then snickered and gossiped about her behind her back. Even her mother started disappearing for weeks at a time.

The news hit everyone on the outer edges of Stephanie Plum's life all seemingly at the same time, and by chance on the same day.

o0()0o

TPD officer Joseph Morelli was sitting at his mother's table, eating cinnamon rolls and drinking coffee. His mother told him to be there, and since she was still doing his laundry and cooking him dinner, he came. So far, she was busy telling him all about the goings on of the neighborhood, but it didn't take long for the other shoe to drop. " _ **How does it feel, losing the best thing that's ever happened to you?**_ "

Joe sucked the coffee cake down the wrong way and started to choke. Once he got himself under control he asked, "What the hell are you talking about, Ma?"

Angie Morelli cleaned the crumbs up off the table with a napkin. "I'm talking about Stephanie, of course."

Joe sputtered, and the coffee he was drinking joined the cake. "Ma, we're just in an off phase right now. She'll come back to me, she always does."

Angie stood and threw the soiled napkins out. As she walked back to the table, she slapped him upside the head. "Putz. She's been gone for almost a year and you think she's coming back? And for what? To sit around the house and raise your bambinos while you make another 'discreet' visit to the free clinic?"

Joe's eyes almost bugged out of his head. "She's lying, it's not what you think!"

Angie shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Cielo mi risparmiò da pazzi (Heaven spare me from fools)." She looked at her son. "Stephanie didn't tell me, one of the neighbors works at the pharmacy where you got your presecription filled. In fact, Stephanie was probably too kind in her last letter."

Joe held up his hand. "Letter?"

Angie shrugged. "Yes, her last letter. We've been writing back and forth ever since she moved."

Joe slammed his hands down on the table. "You wanna tell me where she is?"

o0()0o

Helen sat at her own table nursing a cup of coffee laced with rum and butterscotch schnapps. After Frank pulled his disappearing act, She started drinking earlier and earlier until Edna had to convince her to mix in a little coffee in the morning. Edna was at the stove, cooking breakfast. Helen was no longer in any shape to be trusted near an open flame.

Edna stirred the eggs and looked at her daughter with disgust. " _ **How does it feel my dear? Losing the best thing that's ever happened to you?**_ "

Helen looked up from her coffee cup. "I don't understand it, ma. He just left. Disappeared. Vanished. It's been months, and I haven't heard a word from him. Why did this happen to me?"

Edna scooped some eggs onto the plates. carrying them to the table, she said, "I was talking about your daughter, but we'll work with what we've got."

"Stephanie? What on Earth are you talking about, mother? Stephanie has been nothing but a thorn in my side ever since she jumped off the garage roof. At this rate she'll never settle down like she should. Frank is the one who promised to stay with me till death do us part."

Edna harrumphed. "Face it, Helen, if you didn't nag and berate that girl until she left, your husband would still be sitting at this table in the morning. He left to visit her, and stayed there because he liked the peace and quiet."

Helen went very still. "You know where Frank is?"

Edna finished her eggs. "Of course I do. You would too if you could only keep quiet long enough to listen. In fact, that's where I'll be going this afternoon. Lorraine from the Senior Center is taking me to the airport this afternoon, so you don't need to worry yourself."

Helen shrieked, "WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GONG?"

o0()0o

Lula came rushing into the bonds office, late as usual. Connie, the office manager, was polishing her nails. She looked up and said, "Dammit Lula, it was your turn to bring the donuts."

Lula dumped her spandex clad posterior onto the couch. "My ass. I bought donuts the last time. Why ain't white girl coming around no more? She always brought us the best donuts ever."

Vinnie stormed out of his office, hands fisted on his hips. "Don't you two have anything better to do? Lula, go bring in a skip or something. I'm not paying you so sit on your ass." He turned around and stormed back into his office, slamming the door.

Lula huffed. "I don't need to listen to his crap, I'm a woman of principles. I'm going over to Mooner's and see what's going on."

Connie looked at her. "Mooner's not out on bond right now."

Lula picked up her purse and walked to the door. "I know that, but I bet he's got something to munch on."

A short while later, Connie tapped on Vinnie's door and went in. "How come you come out and yell at us every time we start talking about stephanie?"

Vinnie slammed his desk drawer shut. "You haven't figured it out? She left here almost a year ago. Have you heard from her?" Connie shook her head no. "Do you know where she went?" Again, Connie shook her head. "Have you tried to get in touch with her?" At Connie's blank look, he snorted in disgust. "You were supposed to be her friend, Connie. Lula tells everyone how Stephanie saved her life. Neither one of you would have even noticed that she left if it wasn't for the fact that she stopped bringing donuts. _**How does it feel, losing the best thing that's ever happened to this whole place?**_ "

Connie looked down at the floor. She knew that Vinnie was right, but she would never tell him that. "So where did she go?"

o0()0o

Lula went to Mooner's house where life was pretty mellow. She found him on the couch watching 'Touched by an Angel'. Lula wandered into the kitchen and found some funyuns. She came back into the living room and settled on the couch next to Mooner, getting baked and watching TV. After the episode was over, he turned to her and asked, "So, what was it like for you?"

Lula was confused. "What was what like?"

Mooner shook his head. "What was it like to be touched by an angel? _**How does it feel, losing the best thing that's ever happened to you?**_ "

Lula shook her head. "Dude, you gotta stop watching this syrupy crap. what you need is a good episode of The Brady Bunch."

Mooner stood up sadly. "Nah, I'm not in the right place for that. I think I'm ready to go to the station now."

Lula was high enough that she forgot that there was no warrant out for mooner. As she was driving him downtown, they were pulled over by Officer Gaspick, who arrested Lula for driving under the influence. They wound up sitting in cells across from each other when Lula asked him, "What did you mean by all that angel stuff?"

Mooner looked at her. "I'm talking about the Dudette. You know, Stephanie? Trenton isn't the same without her here."

Lula stood up. "What do you know about Stephanie?"

"I know she was a better angel than Roma Downey."

Shoshanna Brown sat next to Lula and nodded at the cell where Mooner sat. "You talkin' about Stephanie Plum?" Lula nodded yes and Shoshanna continued, "Things haven't been the same since she moved away."

Mooner nodded. "She sent me a postcard yesterday. She's happy where she is now."

Shoshanna sighed. "I should give her a call."

Lula stood. "I wanna know what you two are talking about. Ain't nobody seen her, ain't nobody heard from her. I was her best friend, don't you think that she would call me first?"

Just then Officer Gaspick walked up to Mooner's cell and opened the door. "Walter Dunphy, you're free to go. I apologize for locking you up, but she said she was bringing you in." He pointed at Lula. "If you want, I'll help you fill out a complaint."

Mooner shook his head. "No problemo." Looking at Lula he said, "Not cool dude, not cool."

As they walked toward the door, Gaspick said, "Next time you talk to Stephanie, give her my best. I sure do miss her around here."

Before the door closed Lula shouted, "Wait! where the hell is Stephanie Plum?"

o0()0o

In a moment of perfect (albeit unknown) synchronicity, Angie, Edna, Vinnie, and Mooner all said the same thing that Stephanie herself said, "Miami". The difference was that Stephanie was sitting on her veranda sipping coffee in the morning sun, and hers came out as a purr.

Ranger stepped out the door behind her and leaned down to kiss her. "I told you that you would love it here."

Stephanie put her coffee cup on the table next to her and wrapped her arms around him. "I'd love it anywhere you are."

Ranger smiled and stood, bringing her with him. "I should bring you to the Boston office in the winter. That would change your mind." He was smiling, so she knew he didn't mean it. Tucking a curl behind her ear he asked, "Are you sure you don't want your grandma to stay with us until she finds a place of her own?"

Stephanie shuddered at the thought. "No. Now that dad's down here away from mom, he and grandma get along much better. He's the one that offered her his spare bedroom. She even gets along great with his girlfriend."

The pair looked out over the water. The Rangeman Miami office was located right on South Beach, and the 7th floor apartment had spectacular views. Ranger kissed her again and said, "Do you ever think about going back?"

She squeezed her arms tightly around him and said, "Are you kidding me? _**There is NO WAY I'm going to lose the best thing that's ever happened to me**_."


End file.
